breathoflight | ♕ 008 warden filter voice

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♕ 008 warden filter voice

[Snow has been thinking. A lot. About deals and going home and everything. She feels like she's at a crossroads. She's recently been unpaired from her inmate, which she supposes isn't like losing her inmate, but it's still a little discouraging. It would be simple to just return home. Let that be that.]

[But she's started to wonder if it's just her deal that keeps her here. She's started to create bonds and friendships here that she knows she'd miss dearly if she were to return to her world. In short, she doesn't know what that means.]

How many of you have intentions of returning to your world once you have succeeded with your inmate? Do you wish to return simply because the deal you have arranged is all that you have left to do or wanted to do in the first place?

Or must you return?

[Snow hesitates a moment before adding:] Have any of you changed your mind?

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[Snow hesitates a moment before she switches it to private.]

I am just concerned that...

[Snow stops there because wait, she needs to back up a little.]

I have feelings. For Alex. As more than just a friend.

[She's really glad this is voice because she might be a little red right now.]

Oh. Oh.

[Remember how I said he'd be relatively qualified to discuss this?

I didn't say he'd be good at it. B(]

Yeah, uh, that sucks. I mean, it doesn't suck, that's cool- I think you guys would be good for each other, [??? words what are they SOMEONE HELP.] But. Yeah, I can see where that would make stuff... really, really hard.

Did you guys like... talk about it at all?

[Snow shakes her head until she vaguely remembers that she needs to use her words because he can't see that.]

No. I... I'm not afraid to talk about it, but I am worried about how Alex would handle it were something to go awry. If either one of us should return to our worlds by our own choice or circumstances we couldn't foresee.

Raven says that's a bridge that we will cross when we get there, but the Barge is too unpredictable for me to simply ignore the possibility we may be separated.

And it is impossible for me to completely ignore my duty to my kingdom.

Yeah. [Peter's quiet for a moment, trying to figure out how to proceed from here. This is totally uncharted territory in like, every way imaginable for him, and it's weird, to think that it took this long to actually feel like he's part of a peer group and has friends.

Well, besides Gwen anyway.]

Look, I know I kind of suck at this, and it's not like I know exactly what you're going through, but if you want to like... talk, or whatever, I know how lousy it is feeling like you've gotta give up someone you care about for the greater good.

[Or their own good, and that's... going to be interesting when he goes home and Captain Stacy's still alive. He's never going to be sorry he saved his life, but it does complicate stuff.]

I appreciate it, Peter. You're a good friend. Know that even if you do not understand everything exactly, I do value your advice.

[And she means, that sincerely. Peter has helped her through a lot every step of the way. She considers him almost as close to her as William or Eric at this point.]

I don't believe this will be something I discuss with him right away, at any rate, if I do decide to say anything.

I need more time to think.

[Because, okay, Alex is a main concern, but she also has to worry about herself, too. She needs to be happy with whatever she decides. Or, well, at the very least be able to tolerate the decision and feel rest assured that she's done the right thing.]

I mean... [There is a good possibility this will not be taken well at all, but.] He is in a coma right now, so. You've definitely got time.

And even if he wakes up five minutes from now, your secret's safe with me.

[It's okay, Peter. She knows what you meant by that. c: She ain't mad. It does give her a fortunately small amount of time away from him to think on this that she wouldn't have otherwise albeit not the most ideal of separations if there is such a thing.]

I appreciate that, Peter. I would honestly hate to even imagine if someone else were to tell him.

[She'd be angry less that her confidence was broken, but that Alex wasn't told directly from her. There would be no telling what would happen, what would go through Alex's mind between then and by the time they spoke again.]

Believe me, I get that. [Not that he really had people who could tattle on him like that back home, anyway. Except when Uncle Ben had been goofing around in front of Gwen, which had been kind of mortifying, and now the memory's just kind of sad, because he's not around to do that kind of stuff anymore.]

So, I know this is kind of a "don't get your hopes up" kind of thing, but I can definitely start figuring out if there's some way to communicate with each other after we head home. I mean, until I get reassigned, it's not like I've got anything better to do.

If it's something you would wish to pursue. I would not wish to ask you to embark on a useless endeavor for my sake.

Please, I need more stuff to do.

[She laughs a little.]

I appreciate it.

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